Friday, March 5, 2010

My Computer Smells Like Feet! Stories From My Early Days


Sitting here at lunch today for some odd reason I kept thinking about some of the more entertaining experiences I have had when it comes to IT. There is one incident that stands out as stranger than fiction. I remember it plain as day and if I had to give it a name I would call it "My computer smells like feet"

So I know what you are thinking this is a complete joke.. So did I when the ticket came in. We had what you could call a handler that all tickets came to and he would then distribute it to the techs. I was probably 19 years old and this was my first real IT job. I had only been on the job for a few months so I was the low man on the totem pole. I got all kinds of crappy tickets for this as sort of a right of passage. Anyways I get back from working on someone else's problem when there is a bunch of people standing around my desk.

At first I was like oh no... what did I do? Did I mess something up and everyone is going to give me the business about it? (A few days before that I messed up an executive assistants machine but that is another story) So I was nervous when the handler came up to me and said we got a good one for you. The ticket says something about her computer smelling like feet. Immediately everyone else was laughing and I knew this was gunna be a shit job.

Reluctantly I took the ticket and headed to the building where the user sat. I get there and the cube has a nice view with a window. Thinking this was a joke I was like "I am here for the smelly computer". That got a few laughs but unfortunately for me she was serious. So the user explains to me that she will be working on her PC and it will start smelling like funky feet. Again I probe her to see if it is a joke but she keeps reassuring me that this is serious.

This was probably 1996 or 1997 and the place I was doing work used AST computers that were in a midtower case that was a pain to take apart. Also keep in mind we had to dress up for work sort of like the geek squad does now. You had to wear slacks and a tie. At this point I am under the desk on my hands and knees smelling the inside of this users PC. Just to make it more humiliating a couple of the guys came over to observe about the time I started smelling it. Everyone was sorta laughing and making fun so I was done. I thought to myself this user is playing a joke and the other techs are in on it and it is just rookie hazing. I tell the user I can't smell anything and I was tired of snorting dust bunnys.

I start to put the computer back together and was pretty pissed. At this point I was quite the spectacle in this part of the office. Just when I was going to say something it happened. All of a sudden I get this huge wiff of someone's stank ass feet. It was some serious foot funk like something you would expect on the set of a tough actin tinactin commercial. It was so funky I had to get out from under the desk. I was able to confirm the users complaint that her computer smelled like feet.

Here was the weird part though. The computer was turned off. After a few moments the smell dissipated so I finished assembling the PC and started looking around under the desk. Was someone using this for shoe storage or something? Then a couple of feet away under the desk was an AC vent. When the air kicked back on the smell came back. Turns out a squirrel had decided to get into the ventilation and die and the smell wasn't someone with a foot odor problem but a squirrel feeding some bacteria.

Although this is a funny story and I caught a lot of shit from my peers I learned a valuable lesson that day. When troubleshooting always keep an open mind no matter how weird the problem might be. A lot of times we approach a situation where we think we already know the answer and are blind to the real source of the problem. I knew that people were pullin a fast one on me until some feet stank odor popped up and slapped me in the face to teach me this lesson. Sometimes the answer is not in front of your face.. its in the AC vent :)